Be Yourself

The anxious, scrawny looking boy gazes intently and keenly as the buff, popular boys pose like big, oversized, intimidating gorillas. Skinny and slim girls can also be found twirling their hair as they challenge and flirt with the boys at UWC Tent Plaza during lunch time. But why is this popularity contest such an huge and important thing between teenagers?

According to G.M Williams, the image of being popular is a person who is considered and believed to be important, happy, liked and supported by school. To be popular is to be adored, adulated and loved. To be popular is to actually be somebody, like an entity.

But being popular doesn’t only give out positive vibes. It has its share of negative as well. Some of the popular kids are disliked by other students. But this may be because of envy and jealousy but also because the standout teens can be bullies or part of the mean girls clique.

Cristie is often called a malicious girl who often feels inferior to herself. When interviewed, on the behavior of Cristie, a shy introvert expressed that she often feels that Cristie judges her and the introvert claims to feel her self-esteem go down, almost like an instinct.

Another interview with a talkative and chatty bystander suggests that Hunter is a really funny and witty guy but he often makes fun of him while joking. He also adds that Hunter’s actions and behavior have a high contrast when he’s with the ‘cool kids’ and when he’s with the so called ‘un-cool kids’.

Still, the big question is, what does being popular in middle school tell us about the world outside the bubble of adolescence? Why does being popular matter to the students? Does it matter?

According to Professor Allen, who is using the criteria of likeability to define popularity, his studies indicate that the more the popular the teens were, the more likely that they get into trouble with wild deviant and quirky behavior, like shoplifting or vandalism and drinking and smoking. According to him, its the one way to signal to their peers that I’m not doing what adults want. To indicate that I don’t listen to anyone. I am independent and an antagonist.

But another story of 13 and 14 year olds found that teenagers who perceived themselves as well liked and comfortable with their peers were just as socially successful over time as those who were deemed popular by others. This internal sense of social acceptance, the study’s authors said, may be as or more important in the long run than the number of friends you have.

But one of the questions which races into my mind is, so why isn’t popularity of any significant value?

The idea that someone is better just because they own an ‘posh’ car, an expensive wardrobe and have an alluring or a pristine body is just absurd. Hear me out readers. No one is better than someone else. We all were born equal and because of those senseless and ludicrous rationales, treating others different is again, just absurd.

Most of the people are convinced by that fact that popularity leads the way to happiness and contentment all the time. And of course, and some of that might be true. Lots of popular kids are contemplated as more happier, just because they are admired and because they are surrounded by lots of friends with whom they have fun with. But on the other hand, there are the unpopular kids who aren’t very happy but they have a good, loyal set of friends which make each other happy.

So, popularity doesn’t control or determine your happiness but instead, what you do and what you make of your life does. Whether or not everyone in your class or grade is fond of you shouldn’t determine your middle school experience. You should be able to control your happiness by who hang out with the people you love and doing the activities in which you take pleasure in. Be yourself. Being popular isn’t important. It is as straightforward as that.